Of James Spader, Failure and Farrah Fawcett 'do

My cousin, Jo Cacho, actually sent out a great piece - that I'll be sharing more of shortly - that reminded me of a scene from a 1985 James Spader film that I caught a few nights ago.  Yup, been on a nostalgia trip lately - my fave radio station is Retro 105.9 (the name says it all) and my line up for films to check out on YouTube feature men with mullets and women with big hair.  Yup, time for me to take out my Spraynet. 

 

On the side:  I don't know what it is about looking back and reminiscing - I suppose it's a throwback to one's simpler life of being young and carefree.  Don't get me wrong, I've repeated it a million times now I'm having the best time of my life and so, no, I'm not dreaming about going back to a time when I was awkward, pimpled and looked like I really belonged in a UNICEF poster for Africa.  

Getting back:  There'd been a conversation between Spader's character and his father as he'd been a troublemaker and was now adjusting to a new high school.  Another misstep led him to question things - this is when the Dad uttered lines that made my laboring through a lot of really lousy movies (almost) worth it:

"I expect you to make mistakes.  That's what life is all about, for God's sake.  How else are you gonna learn who you are and what you believe in?  Look, son, life isn't a problem to be solved, it's a mystery to be lived.  So live it."

                                                         From "Tuff Turf"  

                                                                                                                 

As mentioned, Jo sent a piece by a well-known life coach named Martha Beck and in it she talks about how failure is what is actually needed for one to be a better person.  It's a must-read (unlike "Tuff Turf") and you can check it here.  

 

Indeed, I'd never get the chance to enjoy this "best time of my life" had I not failed in the US - gulp, it sends shivers up my spine just thinking about how much more "successful" I could have been over there.

An employee of ours had been let go during a downsizing period as members of the team had been unhappy about his whining ways - he'd get the job done quite well, yes, but it'd been always with a dollop of vinegar.  The others had tired of him and got him out a la "Survivor."  

He'd enjoyed the time away for a while - eventually making almost three times more - but, finally reached a difficult period including the hospitalization of his wife.  An opening left the door open for his return, after a year, and a six hour ride with him Thursday produced this gem - corroborated by his colleagues:

"Salamat sa pagbalik ko at ngayon alam ko na kung paano ako dati.  Dati talaga masungit ako kaya ngayon talagang bantay ko na ang ugali ko.......Di talaga tungkol sa pera ang lahat."   

I suppose one just has to be philosophical about things and figure out that there really must be a reason for everything - including failure.

November 15, 2014  

Einstein and the Theory of Relativity

"Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT'S relativity." - Albert Einstein

We'd been without a helper for a month.....and it felt like a decade.  In essence, this piece is about this:  Your views....perspective on things are shaped by your experiences....in comparison to what's around you.  

To that salaryman, for example, living in Yuzawa, Japan, having a helper is just the way it is and doesn't think much of it.

Another way to look at it is this:  A person in Peshawar feels he's poor because he hasn't been able to eat in three days....while a person in Fayette, Mississippi feels exactly the same because he doesn't have enough to pay for his cable bill.  

Closer to home, I'd shared among some of you what I'd heard during a recent barangay meeting in our village about the opening up of a new gate leading to the outside - to ease the horrible traffic congestion during rush hour.  Here are gems:

- From a retired, chauffer-driven woman who, obviously, doesn't go out much: "I don't understand what this is all about.  There's no traffic...."  Like I said, "views...perspectives....shaped by experiences."  

- Another beauty:  "You know, the other barangay administration was better. They didn't do anything - so, they were not corrupt."  I don't even know how to comment on such a self-defeating statement.

To the younger, working people in the crowd, the gates had to be opened.....while the retired ones who had nothing to do wanted the status quo.  

I think one of the more revolutionary insights I've learned is the idea of things being all relative.  It's what's made me sensitive to what I say and do - witness Binay claiming to be poor...."Yes, Jej, I'm sure you're poorer than the politicians attacking you, but, please compare yourself to the 99.9% of us." 

Written November 9, 2014