`Surely not,' she said.
`Oh yes,' he said.
`Well, I wouldn't,' she said.
`Oh yes you would. For instance, would you sleep with me for... for a million pounds?'
`Well,' she said, `maybe for a million I would, yes.'
`Would you do it for ten shillings?' said Bernard Shaw.
`Certainly not!' said the woman `What do you take me for? A prostitute?'
`Madam, we've established that already,' said Bernard Shaw. `We're just trying to fix your price now.'
My wife, that would be Kelly, complained why I have to call it "whores" and not a more generic phrase like, "We've All Got A Price" or something as innocuous. Look, I'm desperate to get readers. "Whore" seems, I don't know, controversial and seems to make for bad publicity. And, as any astute Filipino knows, there's no such thing as "bad publicity."
I once wrote Jessica Zafra an email that was both affectionate:
I belong to the generation (39 years old, middle-class, educated, etc.) that adored your Today columns. Yes, I remember 1994. You were able to put to words our feelings, fears....ok, bit too dramatic - more like angst. I still remember reading "Worldwide Domination" that year. I once almost went up to say hi when a friend and I spotted you at a cafe in Megamall in '95.
and critical:
Am quite surprised about the stuff you've been writing about. I left (1995) when you were angry, hopeful, funny and biting. I can still see that part of you in your writing but it's overshadowed by someone who has joined the establishment.
Did I feel betrayed by someone I looked up to? You do, when you see that person hawking Adora in The Philippine Star. But, that was before I became poor and started learning about "envelopmental journalism." You see, sorry for you and good for me if you're not aware, but Philippine media seems to be largely...how do I delicately say this, "corrupt." Now...now, corruption is all relative, am I correct? What could be considered corrupt in..let's say...Norway... may not necessarily be wrong here.
Let's just say that the...okay, let's compromise here... "Western" definition for corruption is, "abuse of public power, office, or resources by government officials or employees for personal gain, e.g. by extortion, soliciting or offering bribes."
Now, consider these glossary of terms used to describe....ehem...transactions in Philippine journalism*:
AC-DC For attack-collect-defend-collect. A kind of journalism where the reporter attacks a person in order to collect money from that person's rival or enemy. The same journalist then defends the person originally attacked, also for a fee. MY NOTE: Uproarious.
ATM journalism Refers to reporters who receive discreet and regular pay-offs through their automated teller machine (ATM) accounts. News sources simply deposit cash into these accounts instead of issuing checks or handing the money over to the journalists in envelopes. Often, the accounts are in the names of relatives, rather than of the reporters themselves. ATM journalism became popular in the 1990s, taking over from the more simple "envelopmental journalism" that took place in the 1970s and '80s.
Ayos As in "fix," the act of bribing reporters either with money or other gifts like late-night entertainment.
Bicycle Gang Refers to the contacts of politicians in television news desks who ensure that video footage of candidates barnstorming in the provinces is circulated to the different TV networks by a messenger riding a bike.
Blood Money A pay-off to ensure that a story or critical article is killed or else slanted in the briber's favor before publication. This is different from "smiling money".
Bukol From the Tagalog word that means a bump, usually on the head. A reporter gets a "bukol" or is considered "nabukulan" if he or she fails to get a share of the largesse being distributed by politicians and other news sources whom they cover.
Didal Refers to the practice of media handlers pocketing for themselves a part of the money intended for distribution to reporters. For example, if a party's media bureau sets aside a P2,000 allowance for each of the reporters covering an event, the media staff would distribute only P1,000 to P1,500 and keep the rest. The reporters in this case consider themselves "nadidal."
Envelopmental journalism A take on "developmental journalism," which became popular in the 1970s. Journalism is deemed "envelopmental" if it involves an envelope of cash paid to journalists to sway their reporting.
Hao Siao A derogatory term used to refer to pseudo-journalists, those not employed by a reputable news organization but pass themselves off as journalists in order to cash in on payoffs and bribes made by news sources, particularly during elections.
Inteligensia Cash given as bribe or protection money to the police, a part of which goes to journalists covering the police department. Some reporters have begun using the term to refer to the regular payments that they get from law enforcers.
Main Event Refers to the act of distributing cash to journalists. A press conference or news coverage is not deemed over until the cash is dispensed -- this is considered the "main event."
Orbit Like planets revolving around the sun, reporters also make the rounds of offices, particularly the police stations, to get their weekly payola. The term may also refer to any effort to visit offices for the purpose of soliciting money from news sources.
Placement The position or department within the media bureau of a government agency or company that is in charge of ensuring that press releases are sent to news offices and published or aired when they should be. While there are PR professionals who do the job, some journalists are hired to ensure "placement' as well. Some journalists also moonlight as writers for candidates, ensuring placement by making appeals to their friends in newspapers and broadcast agencies.
Point Man A reporter or editor working in a news organization but who is also paid by a candidate or political party to ensure that press releases are published or aired and also to warn the candidate of negative stories emanating from rival camps.
Smiling Money Cash that is given to reporters or editors for no particular reason except to create goodwill between a source and the journalists. It can also be used to refer to a payoff given after the publication of a positive story, supposedly as a gesture of the source's appreciation.
Tigbas Cebuano word for "cut", used to refer to a hatchet job. MY NOTE: My gulay, even the those loveable Cebuanos are in on it.
Now, with the plight I'm in: rent to pay, tuition to an exclusive all-girl's school, one of the highest electricity rates in the world, gymnastics classes, P300.00 movie tickets, car mortgage, househelp, gas, etc., I completely understand that I was being naively critical of you, Ms. Zafra.
No, I'm not saying that Jessica Zafra is corrupt. Fact is, she's probably just obligated by her paper to tout in her column the companies that advertise. Somehow, though, I have a feeling she's not too happy about that. I'd like to think that she's someone who does not accept anything for her coverage.
Ethical dilemmas, though, are raised: Is it okay to push products through opinion writers? If it's not a good product, do you still come up with a positive review? If the advertiser is guilty of some wrongdoing, will objectivity still be possible?
I'm sure those are weighty issues worth tackling...by somebody. As for me, I want to be known as the Bond, James Bond of Philippine media. Cause now I have the License to Shill (Was that good? That's the kind of writing, I have observed, that could get me a regular gig in the Lifestyle section of a daily). Yes, screw principles. Call me the Congressman of principles: "Heck, everybody's doing it why shouldn't I."
As a lot of my fellow Filipinos know, principles mean nothing when you're hungry for a Dad's cross-over buffet, you want a nice vacation in Singapore for the wifey and the little brats, college education at a non-State university, an extra car (or two), maybe a driver...and...and an extra helper (or two) to look after the afore-mentioned brats. Also, I can no longer stand the shame of still being partly supported by my parents and brother-in-law.
I'm glad I live in a society that has lowered its moral benchmark (speaking of Bench: I'm willing to cover your sexy events for free. Just don't tell the others) that I don't feel so dirty accepting envelopes of cash or deposits into my ATM (please see my account number below).
So, PR and Placement people: Listen up, these are the things we can do to my blog:
Vacation:
Here we are enjoying our stay at the wonderful (Your resort here:__________. Price: Three nights minimum stay, airfare for four, transfers, free meals and P15,000.00 allowance).
We were met by the wonderful General Manager (Price: P2,000.00) and his lovely assistant (P1,000.00). It was the most relaxing time. ___________ Resort (P7,000.00) really is a gorgeous place. My, did we have such enchanting memories on our trip home.
Total Cash Involved: P25,000.00
Political:
_________ Says Doctors Should Be Paid More
Sen._________ is batting for higher compensation for doctors to encourage them to stay and practice their profession in the country.
_________ noted that a lot of doctors have opted to become nurses....
Total Cash Involved (TCI): Guys, I'm willing to work "Smiling Cash Money." I'm not that greedy.
Good Old-Fashioned Peddling:
The 2010 holiday collection of _____________ (P30,000.00) studies the complex and intricate relationship between women and shoes. This ranges from the perspective of sexuality, culture , psychological to feminism studies, providing us with insight into women's desire for shoes. Sigmund Freud said....
___________ is available at Greenbelt 5, Power Plant Mall, Shangri-la Plaza Mall and Glorietta 4.
TCI: P60,000.00
TV Programming:
A Week Packed with Stories on _________
_____________ presents another enriching week starting tomorrow, Nov. 15 as ________ lifestyle show presents informative, entertaining episodes at _______ AM / PM.
TCI: P30,000.00
Corporate Social Responsibility (CSR):
__________ Corporation recently presented the City of ___________ with 15 new boats to be used in the event of disasters. Present at the turnover were Vice President for Corporate Communications Mr / Ms ____________ and ________ City Mayor _________.......
TCI: Again, "Smiling Cash Money" is sufficient.
So, there you go....just to be clear with everybody: I AM FOR SALE. I'm easy: I want to go on junkets to Hollywood or Guam, I want to be photographed with the most beautiful men and women of the Philippines, I want my Main Event at press conferences, I want to be able to attack and defend public figures in scandals, I want my own column in one of the dailies. My God, I just want to be the next famous columnist and...and... if this is fine with God, I'd like to eventually run for public office.
Possibly, my only regret in all of these is that I missed the elections. I could have done this astroturf ("campaigns that are formally planned by an organization, but are disguised as spontaneous, popular "grassroots" behavior") campaign by Manny Villar's (obviously) camp in my sleep:
The Youth Who Call Themselves 'Orangeneration'
The Philippine Star December 04, 2009
MANILA, Philippines - "What can be so special about orange?” one tends to ask after coming across a 5,000-strong national youth movement named “Orangeneration,” whose numbers are growing fast across the breadth and length of the archipelago.
They were in Quezon City, Pasig, Cainta, Taytay, Angono and up to Montalban, Rizal at the height of Typhoon Ondoy, conducting rescue and relief operations. They were also the first...
Funny that you can smell a "faxed-job" (my term describing those PR campaigns sent by fax) a mile away because a piece does not have a byline.
That's okay if I missed the elections as I'm ready and determined to make up for lost pay. Now, I happen to be a thief with some honor. So, this is what I promise you my dear loyal, gullible reader: I will disclose to you whatever I make on this enterprise. If I'm feeling a little generous, I just may give 10% to charity.
Where's my conscience, did I just hear someone ask? The indifferent majority do not care if there is corruption in the media. They're already programmed to accept malfeasance in all aspects of Philippine society. I'm sure they'll be "shocked, shocked" to know there's dirty money on the 6:30 news. As for me? I guess one gets desensitized to something when it's part of one's environment.
Democracy - a proper working democracy - defined as "form of government in which governing power is derived from the people" will only work if it has a citizenry that is active and involved. One of the ways for them to be involved is if they are informed and enlightened. Am I blaming the news media for the current state we are in? Partly. Are we getting the right information that's important for responsible citizenship? You tell me: Is there any depth in the reporting found in the evening news, the print media and on radio? Can you honestly say it's not infotainment...show biz-type news you're receiving?
In theory, this is how a component of democracy should work: Media uncovers misconduct, is able to report it freely, citizenry gets involved, wrongdoing is stopped, responsible people incarcerated, vigilance raised, wash, rinse, repeat... You have the time? Click here to find a recent example of this.
Now, I understand I'm ruffling a few feathers with what I'm doing. You in the media may want to keep fooling the public with your lies (Attack) so I'm willing to back-off with a pay-off (Collect). Price: P500,000.00. See, I'm getting good at this.
By the way, to those interested? Yes, I'm willing to sleep with anybody. Price: P30,000.00.
Here's someone who does not understand our plight:
Part 1
Part 2
Probably, the only way to close this piece:
*excerpted from "News for Sale" The Corruption & Commercialization of the Philippine Media" by Chay Florentino-Hofileña
